Throughout the last three years, I've been working to become more outgoing and to get closer to women. I've always suffered from social anxiety and because of it, I simply can't get close to people. When I was at UCSD, I had so many chances at a relationship but never took the chance because I was so afraid. One girl after another, each one absolutely stunning and beautiful, who were interested in me, left because they thought I wasn't interested in them. I was but I was too much of a coward to express it. Sigh.
One of those girls was Julia Popova. Blonde, 5 foot 2, econ major, accounting minor, and Delta Gamma sorority. She was absolutely stunning and I had no idea why she was attracted to me. She kept trying to get my attention but due to a communications mishap I thought she hated my guts, but later on realized she was attracted to me. I thought she and I had nothing in common, until one week during the winter 2011 quarter, that we both found out that we both majored in econ and minored in accounting. I tried to ask her out on Valentine's day, I even bought her a card and a teddy bear, but I fucked up again and couldn't do it. I wish I did. She pretty much hated my guts after that. Sigh, I hate my life. I really need to get rid of this anxiety, otherwise a chance with someone as stunning as Julia will pass by again.
Note to self: Don't let another Julia go by again.
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